I Am So ... Lucky

I Am So Lucky. It's all I can think about this week. I survived a hurricane, one in which devastated vast parts of my local area and the Eastern sea board. My work building has been without power all week, and just blocks away from that building, there is still has massive flooding. Subways are getting back to being operational. Wall Street, after 2 unprecedented closed days, is back to business even! (Those greedy little mongers!) It's all getting back to normal. .. slowly... but surely. Because that's what we do. Life moves on.

I have to admit right now to you that this blog post may not be of the laugh-out-loud, hysterical nature. It probably isn't the time, nor my mind set. I do want to point out straight away, though, that life does move on. So, I should try to bring the humor back, but ... it is hard for me right now.

A friend of a friend knew the 23 year old couple who died while walking their dog, killed by a falling tree. Children drowned. Children died from a tree while they had a sleepover. I mean, there are MANY stories about the tragedies, even of the non fatal kind. And that is hard news to watch in the morning -every day this week - while I drink coffee. It isn't the morning news you want to wake up to. In fact, it numbs you.

I woke up the next day after the storm feeling immediately grateful. My eyes opened and, I have to admit, I was surprised. I saw my alarm clock. It was on! I walked my apartment and checked the walls. I looked at my street and there were just a lot of leaves and branches. But everything seemed fine. Only it wasn't.

You see, on Sunday, we were all advised to stay inside. The wind was picking up and the sky had been oddly grey - almost vacant in a way. Sunday, I was home alone. Not much to do. I swiffered floors, I made meals, I snacked, I read a little, I took a 3 hour nap. It was all pretty ho-hum. Monday, our office was closed and the storm was already clearly on its way. By that afternoon, you knew if was time to stay inside. It was dark for sure by 6 and you could see the wind, but by 7 p.m. - well. that was when I really relied on the golden stuff.

What "golden stuff," you ask? Oh just the ol' standby = whiskey! And Bourbon, too! Having now admitted this, I'd like to thank the good people at Knob Creek and Tullamore Dew for getting me through that night especially.

I live alone. I went through the hurricane alone. And so I drank. Not heavily... but enough. As I had told my father when he called that night at 6:30, "Dad, I'm gonna get pretty schnockered." Dad liked my idea.

A good friend, Stephanie, was the constant texter, asking me if I was ok. We had an entire conversation throughout the night and it helped to keep me partially sane. I watched a James Bond movie, an old silly Roger Moore one. A movie I knew would take my mind off things. Facebook was another welcome distraction. I needed to not think about what was happening outside, because to be honest, I was scared.

I live on a tree lined street. The news warned me all too often about trees throughout the day. Trees were certainly blowing. Yet, it was the street light directly across from my window that concerned me far more. From my couch to window view, I could see the street light swaying back and forth. I assumed this is when those 60 mph winds were visiting, but who knows really? I was on my 2nd healthy pouring of whiskey and ginger. I wasn't taking chances. If shit was gonna go down, I was gonna be nice and buzzed, if not sufficiently ... "happy."

I think I even had a vodka something after some whiskey, too. It was 10 pm at that point - why not? My plan all along honestly was to drink just enough so that I could fall right to sleep soundly. I didn't want to wake up in the middle of the storm. I didn't want to hear more noises. I was afraid.

I was afraid because I was alone. Why was I alone?

I was afraid because I could hear things on the roof. Oh why did I have to live on the 2nd floor?

I was afraid because I could hear cracking noises and it almost sounded like it was in the walls. Was my wannabe row house gonna break off, or worse, crumble (like the one in Chelsea did)?

I was afraid because that stupid tree outside is so close to my window in my living room. Will it smash in?

I knew if the roof held that at least I would be ok in my bed. There was just an alley way next to my bed room and no trees or seemingly big objects. But, I am sure, so many go to bed thinking they are fine, only to discover not so much. I was just hoping and telling myself I was ok.

I wasn't worried about electricity or water, or food. Sure, I bought several cans of soup as well as peanut butter and bread (exciting menu!). I bought a semi-decent amount of water for 1 person for a few days. I charged my phone the whole time, even while using it. I did the little things I thought I should. And I live in Brooklyn and I am further inland. I wasn't coastal. So at the end of the day, I figured I would be probably better off than others - and I was right. Fortunately for me.

And that's when it all hit me the next morning. Fortunately for me.

I am so lucky. And whiskey and bourbon companies should really donate to charity for all the advertisements I have said over the past few days. It got me through and into a safe sleep that night. But so many had so much harder of a night than I did. I can only imagine what families are going through. And I feel stupid for getting stir crazy in my apartment on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. So what if I didn't get to go for a run or have some exercise? I had a home, power, heat, internet, electricity ... blah blah ... I had my life!

The numbers are climbing in the death toll and I really have, for the most part, just stopped looking at the news (as ignorant as that might be). I just have turned myself off to it. The two things that have caught my eye is the amount of charity work people are already doing and the controversy of the NYC marathon this weekend.  

It's amazing. People in this area alone and elsewhere are volunteering and donating money, materials. It just shows you the good that is out there in our fellow people.

And consequently, people are upset the city is still holding the race this Sunday. Now, I understand that people feel it takes away from the tragedy, not to mention the perception that resources would be diverted. I could point out that my understanding is the NYC marathon raises money for charity annually. I could show how people travel and have paid for trips to NYC from all over the world already. I could explain how local businesses in all boroughs really can benefit from the customer base. (You know a runner is coming into your bodega for a gatorade or something to eat. It will happen.)

I could go on and on about many points like that - and some would have their counter points. However, you can't deny this. The NYC Marathon is an event that celebrates life - and only someone who has been to the NYC Marathon can truly understand that it celebrates life. I have seen a person with no legs run the NYC marathon. I have seen elderly people run it. I have seen cancer survivors run it. I have seen firefighters in uniform running to honor one of the fallen. People run this race to give purpose to life. If you think it's just a stupid race and there isn't anything special about that day, then you need to get your head out of your ass. Pardon my Irish!

Having an event that celebrates the best about being a New Yorker, that celebrates surviving, that celebrates remembering a loved one lost - this is a good thing. And every day we have on this earth is a gift. And if you DON'T live that day - every day - and push on and make it count, THAT'S when you're disrespecting those who aren't here to celebrate. We should honor the losses by celebrating the day we have today and the possible gains we could have in the future.

Because that's what we do. Life moves on. Life has to move on.

Love,
Greg