I Like My Body (and I don't care if you gay bee-itches don't!)

So, yes, I like my body. And nope - I don't have a 14 pack of abs under this awesome purple tank top. (See picture) Yep. That's me. Smiling, athletic and - in awesome wayfarers sunglasses! (I love wayfarers at the moment. They make me look like a better Risky Business era Tom Cruise. And the 80s are back. But I digress.)



The point is: I look great. Honest, right? It's refreshing.

I look great probably because I feel great. I am a runner. This picture was taken during the San Diego Rock and Roll Half Marathon that I did for The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society just a few weeks ago. June 3rd, 2012. It was at mile 3 - which when I run - is when I feel undeniably fantastic. Mile 1 is an easy, light feeling. The kind of joy one can only put into words as "look at me!!" Mile 2 is kind of a ---- why.... is my body moving like this... kind of feeling So, mile 3 is that return to - oh yeah - I like this. Henceforth, (big word) I like this picture a lot.

I like it even more because  - man - look at those muscles! And my god, my calves are amazing. If I were gay, I would do me. Oh wait! Well, if I were another gay man, I would do me, too. Basically, lots of doing would happen.

The non-egotistical point is: it took me years and years to feel this way about myself. A really long time. Growing up in high school, I was a bit of a nerd, a school newspaper junkie, and was terrible at gym class in so many ways. I continued that profession through college. It was safe, but the Freshman Forty pound weight gain, wasn't so safe. I hated myself especially in college. It's easily the four years of my life I wouldn't want to go back to, despite the few great friends I made and some of the amazing experiences I had. (This wasn't just because of my appearance, but also being deeply in the closet. These issues really go hand in hand. The weight gain, the feeling of being excluded, not part of anyone's world, scared of rejection, wanting to be yourself and afraid of hate from everyone. It was all a reason to eat Ben and Jerry's and not like yourself further.)




Coming back from that low point of despair was, in part, due to running. It gave me a confidence I never knew I could have. It became something I was actually good at. And by saying this, I know I'm not Ryan Hall and if you don't know him - you should. But if you don't know him, I will give you a reference you can understand. By saying I'm good at running, it means you're pretty good at brushing your teeth. Hopefully, brushing your teeth is something that is natural feeling and healthy to your body and mind and how you like to start your day and end your day. As I like the feeling of running at both times of the day and I often brush my teeth right before I run, this analogy makes sense on so many levels, right????

So, back to my HOT body. Yup, I have a hot body. Did I mention my legs? Because seriously, my legs rock. Everyone says so! I wear shorts to run most of the year (Because when its 80 degrees, you should still run in shorts. A speedo is not an acceptable option.) I even wear shorts to work. I roll them up to show off even more of my sexy legs, and especially that upper leg action. (yea, I even said sexy! dirty word!) I then complete the look with suede oxford shoes.

And - Yes!!! I can style you daily before you go to work also! Rates are negotiable!


Now, gay men all seem nice and friendly to all the straight women of the world. And they are! But oddly enough, to their sexual preference - the other gay males - they are cattiest, most judgmental group of Bee-itches! And they have called me FAT.

TO. MY. FACE......  and also.... IN. WRITING.

Am I fat? No.
Am I obese? No.
Am I unhealthy? (Despite my love of chocolate and coffee?) No.
Do I eat fast food? (as in chain restaurants?) No.

Do I exercise 4-5x a week at least? YES!
Do I try to eat balanced meals and add veggies or fruit or protein and goodness? You bet!
Do I drink my weight in wine? Well, now, let's not make any judgments, ok?

The point is: I work my butt off within reason to try to live to be a billion years old. Will I succeed? Nope, but neither will you - you failed excuse for an Abercrombie model! Oh I kid. You didn't even try to be a model.

For every one person who thinks I'm unattractive, literally - almost instantly - I've talked to someone who genuinely compliments my appearance. I know what I got, too. I'm not the current form of advertising beauty. But, I have a nice smile, a cute face that my mother loves, and literally several others do as well! I have the arms of a champion hugger. (Comment below if you like my hugs. No seriously - DO IT NOW!). And best of all!!! - I have the legs of a runner.



I may not have chiseled abs, rock hard chest, but I have a body that in its 33 years - I love. I cherish. I embrace it. Because let's be honest, my friends. Even if you are a muscle gym god at this very moment, your shit is going to get bad. Not today, but soon. This is the mountaintop in your 30s, and soon, its going to go back down the mountain. So - enjoy your time at the top - if you are like me. Even if you're not. Look at it today and like it. Sure - things could be better. But they aren't worse and they could be. It always could be worse. Always.

The fact is - eventually - you're gonna wrinkle - even more than today.
Your stuff is going to droop - even further.
Unless you're 18.... it is all a matter of time of when it's going to get worse. And if I haven't reinforced this point - it will get worse.

So, if you're healthy - treasure it. Hello?? This is the best time of your life!! No doubt. You can breathe the air, and it feels great. No pain. I can put on sneakers and run 5 miles - like I did this morning (which - side note - was awesome!!! I did 4.83 miles in 41 minutes and 39 seconds, which was my fastest run probably ever. I did an 8:37 minute mile pace. That is good! And if you're faster than me - shut up. And if you're slower than me - thank you!!!)

I have given all of this some very serious thought. And I've said it out loud. This is possibly the best I will ever look. So, I have to enjoy this time. If I don't...I will regret it. And who wants that? I'm still young and looking and feeling good.

Let's go do Greg! Hopefully you will feel the same way about yourself.
And if you're gay...call me! Because... I like my body and you should too!

Love,
Me